Scribbles and thoughts of drugs and genuine progress...

It is a strange time when depression leaves very little energy for much of anything. When depression speaks it says "There are few real people in this world who understand or wish to understand me. I am alone in my heart and in my mind. I am happiest there with people shut out the quiet preferred over the chatter of people scrambling for words that say something to validate their meaningless existence." This is how great and powerful the disease behind the curtain can be. But in truth, like OZ it is just a little man no different than anybody. So depression is and so it should be treated.

Understanding creation is a big job. Having been blessed with a mind that enjoys ignorance while at the same time works toward more noble pursuits of truth and cosmic reality is clearly unnatural. But I have been dealing with these contrasts since I was 17. Transcendental Meditation, the study of the Seth Material and other spiritual books have brought me to a place where I see enough growth to know how very little I have actually grown. Now I have discovered acupuncture meridians and working with feelings via ETF or "Tapping" / www.tapping.com. Releasing negative emotions forever, a very big claim that is likely too good to be true is my current focus on growth, release of potential addictions and ill feelings allusions and behaviors. But something has to replace big pharma. For they will take your life as quickly as the drug dealer on the corner. Let us not deceive ourselves.

We have an anxiety disorder in this family. It is genetic. It leads to substance abuse in most of us. Some hang on. I did for 25 years. Essentially sober from 27 to 51 years old. I have recently experimented with Xanax to relieve anxiety and emotional pain. It works well but it makes me clumsy and a bit lazy in that I am so relaxed I do not force activity and growth in favor of the relaxed bliss of the enjoyable days without painful worry, real and imaginary threats and emotions.

I know I am just masking the symptoms best dealt with cognitively while not directly confronting them. I have been ensnared in a mentality that pills bring permanent relief when I know full well that strength through awareness is the key. Our prescription drug culture is so very effective and yet falls short of any legitimate healing. So we must summon the strength from within, charge the gates and force our growth, painful though it may be in sobriety. Certainly there will be moments when we make exceptions out of compassion for our selves, but where do we firmly draw that line?

To remain anxiety riddled through very bad times like during a break up or after a death of a friend is foolish. Not to medicate can, at times be as foolish as taking Xanax because you are painfully stricken with boredom.

In there lies the challenge. “Love yourself” they say. Why asks depression: "Why should I love myself when I disapprove of my own behavior? Love is earned at any level. I just walk around in this body numb and feeling like a victim, disenfranchised most the time. Depression I suppose, I am used to it. I do not expect anyone to love me though I am glad when they do but I do not invest in myself or commit to people much anymore. Again depression I suppose. I have never been able to get a quality man to love me “enough” to be comfortable in a relationship. So why should I respect myself more than is necessary to provide the survival comforts and basic needs for myself from now until I pass on. Certainly self-respect is based upon track record. Certainly I must care a sufficient amount not to damage myself. Certainly I must love myself enough not to damage my psyche. But self respect comes from a lifetime of tests and lessons that can be best described as Buddhist Koans found in Zen poems and literature. I respect my thoughts and morals enough. I don’t plot to hurt steal or swindle anybody really. I would not be able to take the guilt if I did. I know that others do not feel the same. I feel good when I help others and I am still learning about what it means to give and to take. But I do not appear to have the ambition or drive to add to my world in remarkable new and interesting ways. Or do I? Inspiration and muse is a luxury for the rich, the indomitably happy and the undamaged zeal of youth. For old gays in their fifties with little money and fading sex appeal we are left to, at best, our imagination and at worst the genetic betrayal that is out legacy." As this diatribe of mind-talk takes possession of your soul it makes a good argument that is as counterproductive as suicide. Depression, like any self deceptive concoction of ideas scrambles to make sense while it takes your time and your life.

Regardless of how depressed, morbid or locked away in emotional storage we become; regardless of the circumstances, habits, morals and internal drive we might have we have got to maintain a high standard of living. No mansion or sports car, can satisfy us like positive thinking, clean good thoughts backed up by sobriety and clean living. A solid understanding of human behavior and self awareness is also useful. This understanding comes about in small epiphanies. They occur often when we vanquish the problems of daily life through the spiritual exercises provided by our dear friend reality. These lessons can not deliver their full effect when we are drugged with psycho-active agents. They do not improve your nervous system brain function or spiritual lives. They do not improve our understanding or enhance general consciousness. Drugs and tranquilizers do not add meaning they prevent feeling. Using them to block trauma temporarily is a difficult decision while we balance growth with psychological protection. Until we can deal with reality and adapt to the unexpected in daily life without drugs we hamper our growth. Hence our energy should be directed at diet and exercise as well as meditation massage, study and a strong effort to remain focused on deliberate diligent work. Drugs slow progress even when they are not abused. Even when they are used judiciously they can curb or abbreviate our life experience. This is particularly evident in the use of opiates and Marijuana. I suppose the bottom line question is: Do you want to rust out or do you want to wear out? The answer to which has many probable futures attached. I suppose that is my first original Koan.

To the faithful...

I think I finally figured out why I never use credit cards. I have about the best credit there is out there. I see friends using credit well beyond their means with no guilt or worry. Why is this? I think it is because they have made plans for new products, alternative businesses and new ventures. They pamper and take care of themselves with credit and then allow the universe to cover them. It appears to work but I think it is still wise to be frugal especially when you do not have plans for alternative business or projects that may be profitable in the immediate or distant future. Credit is credit and if you don't have money one should not be spending money. Even if you do have money spending it flagrantly is a mistake.

If they lied to me about Aspertame ... what about the other stuff?

Artificial sweeteners and the FDA. Politics, evil and organized business. And of course Monsanto. Once a regulatory agency is formed they are born captured.
VIDEO Donald Rumsfeld and Monsanto can kiss my ass. The only low calorie sweetener anyone should use is Stevia. Period.

The Beautiful Truth

The Beautiful Truth is an important film associated with Cancer and natural treatments for all diseases.

The remarkable Ma Roller

I have owned what is called a Ma Roller for decades. I have used it in the thing over all these years without knowing its true effect meaning or cosmic beauty of the alignments. I found this image that shows the acupressure points that are effected. After using this tool intuitively for 20 years I have found I am actually using it right. When you are tired stressed or sick or have not exercised for a while and your body feels creeky and locked up is always a great time to use this wonderful ancient tool. Get one for yourself and see! They are great.

Rip out that lawn !!!

According to www.heavypetal.ca "the lawns in the United States consume around 270 billion gallons of water a week - enough to water 81 million acres of organic vegetables, all summer long."
So why do some counties in some states fine you if you rip out your lawn and plant vegetables?

Another day on Dale Street

Simple pleasures and the elegance of urban homesteading in a sub-urban setting is remarkably satisfying. Being in what must have been an early suburb of the city Southpark or what some people call North Hills area of North Park is a pleasure few enjoy in the City of San Diego. Like New Yorkers San Diegans convince themselves that this place is the "best place in the world to live." It takes less self deception here in California but we have our challenges, very different challenges, than New York.

Life mimics fiction here more than back east where life tends to mimic harsh reality. The kindnesses that exist here in California definitely do not exist anywhere back east. At least not to my recollection. I love San Diego. However you either love or hate the pitfalls of living in a society so braising vain and self absorbed that it can sometimes make you nuts. Still, back east you have the same vanity but they are unapologetic and never feel guilty about their self indulgence there - i give you Wall Street.

This lovely old home has been my salvation for the last nine years. I find myself surviving and occasionally thriving here. The terrors of the past alleviated by consistency and continuity of income and reliable friends and stable affordable rent for extraordinary homes.

There is a kindness here that translates across the network of friendships and associations. People who work for quality of life outnumber those who do not. Ignorance runs roughshod over bright and inspiring people but I suppose that is a global problem. I had never seen so many sloppy pig like people and incomplete tasks before I arrived in San Diego. And I had never seen apathy in construction, from doctors offices to coffee houses and restaurants San Diego has always been" laid back." Missing moldings, gaps in wall joints, dirty corners and filthy bathrooms were common here and it does not take much looking to find them still today - even in the most lovely of neighborhoods. I have decided to find it charming. Running into these laid back care free (careless) people of the region is hardly terrorists but they reflect the good nature and priorities of the people. What they lack in interior design they make up for in warmth and pure laziness. Lazy people are always friendly.

Today San Diego resists the horrors of urban blight and suburban decay by retaining its value by which it escapes the national disaster of middle class poverty. Many people who come here do not make it here. I almost did not, but I saw no choice to leave. And though this choice was real I stuck it out and stabilized my life with a creativity and ambitious fervor that in hindsight I am very grateful for.

Now I face being and "older" American and that presents a whole different set of challenges here in Southern California. To be old here is to be unwanted they say. Some reality might validate that claim but life of the East coast was simply too hard and simply too nasty to tolerate. I am glad I left. My friends here are more real and I feel as though my efforts in these relationships are paying off not only for me but for them. The return does come back to me every time from these dear folks but it always comes back sometime.

I try to allow people to bring to my table what they will. No demands and no expectations. That can be a dangerous prospect in a place where so few people are well rounded and broadly educated. Everyone voluntarily forgets that Southern California is the deep south of the west and we have our share of narrowly focused workers who know little more than their jobs.

Must write... having to write what I see.

"I am not calling for a second chance. I am screaming at the top of my voice. Give me reason but don't give me choice because I'll just make the same mistake again." (James Blunt).

Desert This

Great friends like great loves are rare. Fortunately great friends are more common and thank goodness for that since great loves are almost mythical. Nothing in this world is more satisfying than being a part of a group of people who protect you. Short of gang activity groups of ethical law abiding friends can move mountains. There are plenty of sappy lyrics in the world but when it comes time to pay the bills you have to bring this awful thing called reality into focus and you must deliver. When people fall through the cracks what money can't buy is useless. They need money. And they need it like a transfusion - we all do. It's the law. Without money we die, period. Our western society is built on this silent but omnipresent law. It is enforced with German precision, for without money we have less than many of the poorest people of India or Africa as there is often no mechanism to save people from the ravages. Especially for sudden falls from grace. Those are the hardest falls... falls that knock you to the ground with crushing force and numbing psychic shock. To get up off the ground disoriented broken and helpless has to be one of the most terrifying experiences imaginable. One stands up broken and confused and aware that today is very different than yesterday. It is at this time they must gather energy that appears to require more than we can give at that moment, but we must find that 110% simply not to fall again. God is summoned and held to account. And friends are tested as much as our faith in ourselves. The silent indifference of the careless ones falls away from us as the true ones come near to hold us as we take our first steps back into productivity. And so we begin again. Our days start with the inspiration from those who had faith and from the faith we rebuild our confidence and deploy love and ambition and express our gifts in useful service... we press on and go on to build a more beautiful stable and secure future. We go on to become protectors and guardians. Ones who possess the knowledge of one of the sweetest secrets of life deeply imbeded in our souls. Without the help of others we can fade into oblivion forever. And with any luck we will remember them 0r others like them if life turns against them. You will take great joy in the process as you tend to their needs. As you help them stand up, shaken and oblivious, you will know exactly what to do.

Less Parinoid

My last post about trust was rather paranoid, but you have to understand that people come into our lives at time when they all appear to want something. Then other people enter our lives who will not give. They will not give love, time or resources unless there is something in it for them. And usually what is "in it for them" outweighs what they must give in order to satisfy them. It is a selfish cynical world and perhaps I have joined in the ranks of those who find our world, our American "culture" to be disgusting. Perhaps I am just a victim or perhaps I created a victim lifestyle but the truths of our lives, our history and our experience speaks to the truths of our honest and unbridled words. The longer I live the more I appreciate my own personal virtues. If I separate out genuine virtue from fanciful imagined virtues and completely delusional ideas I myself might actually have a little bit of genuine virtue in my life. At least enough to claim that I "did no harm."

....The vision I have for tomorrow rolls out before me with changes to the fabric. Each change an improvement based on newly-calibrated illusions (An illusion is a false mental image produced by misinterpretation of things that actually exist)whereby I do not dismiss the idea that I might be "a little bit off" in my interpretation of reality but closer to identifying the truth in any given matter.
....Identifying Truth is tough. It is tougher than one might think, especially as we get older and get more honest with ourselves. Honesty and truth are not mutually compatible concepts. It is this fact that helps me to understand that life is not automatically a clear perception of truth when stuff gets processed through our prejudices, learned (bad) behaviors and ideas as well as cultural trends and influences. Harsh words like "lie and self-deception" do not escape the honesty in this discipline. Most of us lie to ourselves constantly and we lie to others. .....A truly disturbing fact. "Opinion" being the literal battlefield where ego meets truth and truth meets genuine reality. These enemies are all lies great and small. Lies we tell ourselves every day. It takes a noble strong and brave person to face them. Distilling these lies down to a workable mass then removing our ego and self-deception from them, then literally moving outside ourselves to view them to dissect them and re-assemble them into coherent harmony with universal truth can be daunting task. Once re-entering the atmosphere of our selves the new application of the new formulation can lead to a better life and a more satisfying existence. However to integrate this new information into life takes a masterful manipulation of political and emotional change to realize any genuine results from such changes. In fact as personal truths get closer to universal reality our lives change in ways that can not be imagined but until we have forced our deepest lies and painful illusions through the filter of truth we are fed into a loop of denial, selfishness and ego that will destroy us quite completely without this examination. All the while wondering why our lives have not changed. It is at this point that we begin the cycle if self-deception once again. Only to realize the same outcome. Change is never easy. Truth is often hard to take. Still we are privileged to live in this century of rapid change. To survive as the humans we hope to become there is little room left in the world for lies. Sadly reality can be too harsh to face for many people, but it encroaches anyway with harsh lessons for the uninvolved which makes them part of the problem. I guess the buck stops in the comfort zone. The comfort zone is certainly another topic for another post. All the best for now.

Dangerous Women

“There are dangerous women in this world.
Some are lovers blind to the consequences of their actions.
Some are wives enraged by the betrayal of those they trusted.
Others are predators, deviously setting traps to get what they want.
If you're unlucky enough to come upon one of these dangerous creatures, the safest thing to do is run the other way.” .........I do not trust people. This year even less than last. Women less than men. It is a good day when the smelling salts finally hits your cerebellum only for your to realize that people CAN suck so wildly that most of them APPEAR so useless as not to benefit us in any meaningful way and will always be suspect. Gay straight male or female all people are potentially dangerous. The realities of life our parents worked so hard to shelter us from hit us harder when they finally blow through our lives. Sometimes our disbelief forgives too quickly the sins cast against us and we delude ourselves in fantasies of denial. For some of us this practice is repeated until the day when the lesson finally connects our brains with the truth. People can not be trusted. The paradigms shift and the greatest paradox of life takes its place as the sad fact of life that it truly is. Which is if one man can take away something from another man (or woman) he/she will. Once we have learned and understood this lesson we can still trust people but we verify, check and re-check and we allow time to season relationships and we test the waters of trust more and for longer periods of time. We look for character flaws and weakness in spirit. We watch for pretensions and disorders while we seek out good mental health and a relaxed confidence of one whom might not subdue us. But in the end as the stakes get high we stand to loose it all - everything we have worked for to another we have trusted. A wife, a husband, a child or in a court of law. What we have is so easily taken from us as the line people who would rob us grows longer as times get tougher we must take great care in giving to others and also to make sure when we take from others that it is agreeably our due.

Re: Days of silent wandering and fear.

Xanax calms fears and anxiety when living in a world where one is convinced that either he has lost his mind or every else has lost theirs. When you are relatively convinced that it is they who have lost their minds one relaxes a bit but only to discover that as one gets older one must form bonds with people one can trust absolutely. In this regard I see the need for secret societies, groups of people dedicated to protecting one another.

In fact I would be honored to be a member of such a society such as the Elks, Free Masons, or the like. Often churches play the same role but to a much less secretive degree. Groups are essential to survival and we who have shunned them for reasons only we might know live at risk. That is why I believe I will begin to research the different secret societies. Ferret out what they consist of and try to understand the full embodiment of a choice group tailored to my needs. Everyone needs a family and quite often we Americans find ourselves, as we grow older, alone. We have much to give as older Americans and service becomes more important.

This is why I believe it is time to research which club or organization I will join. Many are by invitation only. And quite often they are completely inaccessible. If anyone is aware of an interesting club or group let me know?

Ashoka, India and the US.

If you are cruel to animals you will be cruel to humans. Throughout history there have been many empires of the sword but only India created an empire of the Spirit. From the edicts of Ashoka was there a logic of humanity of Dharma, a just law of life. Personal morality and politics, social welfare religious tollerance, the conservation of forests. Moving the sphere of politics away from the sanctions of religion and magic to the rule of reason and morality. The extraordinary work of Ashoka's law. And when Ashoka was old, legend tells, that he was a man stripped of everything. ....we have moved away from this in our country. The more I learn about India and the teachings of the Buddha I can not help but believe the message of the Buddha as being true. The morality of Ashoka feels true as well. The politics in these United States never feel right. The corporate juggernauts caught in poisonous pursuits of money disease vanity and ill=will toward humanity animals and the enviornment. It is a sad and lonely place these United States. I wonder if I could stomach leaving?

Of God and Man

By William Zimmermann

Rythm's of life move in and out.
Like sound to our ears the music of life is rhythm.
Each day we rise and each night we fall asleep in time and in spaces where we find ourselves alone. The tides turn into dreams that unfold our destiny, as the ticking mind of the cosmos reminds us how small we really are.
People take and lie and cheat. They steal souls and line their pockets with the futures of young men. Machinations spin around objectives in secretive silences that history will remember differently. But the planets and stars and the vast empty space of the universe do not know us. There is no awareness to know us. Even if there were others who could observe us we would not inspire interest for those who may have mastered the vastness of space and time deal in the currency of this time and in this space where human ambitions are irrelevant.

We are a flicker of time in the history of the universe. We came and went unnoticed and without a single care. Our only hope is that time and space both are illusions. If so who are we then? It would appear we are ego to the degree to which we have constructed ourselves in a imaginary "Gods." For as the fabric of the universe unfolds the face of God remains not only blank but it remains unwaveringly indifferent - the purest definition of hate. We are here by the grace of sheer luck at a time when the beauty of life is enjoyed by the few humans who were lucky enough to evolve from virus to beings. Nature will flush us down the Darwinian toilet in good time as nature will deal with us on its own terms and in its own time. God is simply a manifestation created by the powerless and fearful. Soon we will be gone and with it we will take our gods, the animals and our dreams of domination. Our fanciful dreams, reckless pursuits and unique arrogance will be laid before us shortly before our end. Then, and only then like person at the threshold of death will we see the errors of our ways. There is no hope and there is no need to hope. I amazes me that every person I know does not realize in 20 years we will be erased from this place and from these bodies. We have twenty years left. Maybe. And what we do with those years does not matter to the deaf ears of those rocks that circle about the black hole of Andromeda. The Milky Way hovers above us as our home but does not know we are here. It would seem only we think we contain some magical gift when in the view of pure science humanity is nothing more than a virus gone wild. A cancer with a mind of its own. We are nothing to the blind eyes and ears of a god who never existed. But we comfort ourselves by creating one so we can sleep at night feeling as though we are being cared for. The truth is that God is not dead, he is simply a myth that comforts us in times of strife. We develop him when we should be developing our own network of emotional and psychological mechanisms based on the truth. Knowing this is a great relief. Humanity was a great coincidence. It was a nice little ride in the land of mortality. But we are just animals with a few special skills. And that is all. The rest is just imaginary.

The question is "what do we do with our lives?" Now that we know that absolutely nothing matters. I suppose we can feel free to do anything at all. Express ourselves unrestrained and with as much dignity or violence as we care to perpetrate upon the world. Regardless of how much we love hate create or destroy the universe will expand and shrink and expand again regardless of what we do. To the universe we are infinitesimally small and insignificant.

I want to believe in an after life. Flying around the cosmos in an anti-gravity spirit body or a trans-dimensional body that folds space. Socializing with bright minds and having let go of my mortal constraints with my mind clear, brilliant and unencumbered. And to arrive with a job that allows me to contribute to a celestial family with a whole new body of knowledge to pursue. I do not want to die thinking I will simply END. But the logic and reason of the after life is only fear based fantasy expressing itself as an ultimate lie perpetrated by ninety percent of the population of the world. The ultimate self deception and the ultimate lie that behaviorally speaking can only perpetuate the ease of which other lies can be told. This is the danger of religion and has the potential to end mankind prematurely... all based on a lie. The only one or thing that will have cared will be us. We are alone, we had better get used to it.

Shifting the focus of American ideals

By William Zimmermann

I was watching Spin City with Michael J. Fox. It's a sitcom made in the early nineties when Mike was at his best in his role as manager of the Mayors office in New York City. It occurred to me that I was feeling strangely nostalgic for the early nineties. It was a time when the world was prospering and I felt as though life was passing me by - in many ways. Everyone was working, earning great money, some making huge money and some had only begun to plunder the real estate swing that would last for a decade. The images of a greater New York with the twin towers still intact and Michael J. Fox in prime health serves to remind us to preserve our health and our world. The question "How do we preserve our world?" comes to mind. Many tragedies can be prevented. To balance risk is a great way to enjoy life and preserve it all at the same time. Unfortunate genetic luck as in the case of Mike Fox can not be avoided. But look at the good he and others like Christopher Reeves had done after their focus was inextricably glued to their own personal survival.

How will we survive these days? What challenges will befall us? How can we avoid the big things? Perhaps we can't but we can take the same posture as Mike and Christoper did after their luck changed. We can prepare plans to prevent calamity and we can focus on helping others each day. There is so much need in the world. There is so much each and every American can do to save lives, feel good and help other people to live better and more human lives. We do not need to get a disease to raise money for a cure. We don't need to fall to circumstance if it can be avoided. I know for a fact that I do not give enough back to a world, a country that has been so good to me. Certainly Americans do not connect with each other enough. We are a country of litigation and social programs that cut checks and do little else in support of the health and well being of one another. It is sad that our system of medicine and the structure of care, of education and of industry is so very consumer based that we forget who is doing the providing. It truly is us, but so indirectly that nobody can give from their heart or receive in gratitude the great gifts of this generous country. Out taxes are gathered by Washington and doled out in anonymous philanthropy via Social Security and other programs without as much as a word from those who provided it for us. Medical insurance, the industrial Medical business, the military and all the major systems in this country work about the same way.

There is no opportunity to give generously your gifts when they are sucked in by the government and distributed by the government. Even corporations work the same way. Funny how that is. The individual goes on disconnected. The individual, so very entrenched in this system goes on in complete ignorance of why he or she feels so disconnected. In this age of quiet desperation people need to work together to re initialize the economy with real value, genuine integrity and real products that work well for the people who need them. I think president Obama's idea of a green energy economy is remarkable but I also think it will get lost in corporate and governmental red tape. The purpose of this post is to comment on our need to focus on those who need us and to give genuine value to the world. Americans need to step up to the plate and use resources more creatively. Resources that do not necessarily come from institutions, but from those who give their gift freely. For example: Lets say there is a man who has been studying History for a lifetime but he does not have a teaching "certificate." Who would you rather your child be taught History by? A passionate Historian or a teacher "of history" who probably has more interest in a paycheck than history itself? This concept applies to government, corporations, organizations, institutions and the like. We, as a society need to re-orient ourselves to life in a more natural and less monolithic way in order to get the education we need to express our individual talents properly and to maximize them completely. We can no longer sit in classrooms that fall short of excellence simply because a "certificate" is required to teach them. We can no longer afford to substitute passion with mediocrity. The time has come for each American to take a hard look at life with the same focus as Michael Fox and Christopher Reeves. See into life and find out what really matters. What really truly matters?

The Truth About Solitude

I have been thinking a lot about balance lately. Balance of work, balance of choices, balance in personal discipline. When you live alone there is no one to tell you what to do or to pressure you to be someone or do something you may not want to do or that may be actually good for you. It is a solitary world with only the echo of your own voice inside your head to answer to. I know this voice well and sometimes it becomes deafening. Not really. And I am glad mine doesn't! Generally I get away with doing as I please. I have learned to balance income with liesure, rest with work, sacrifice with taking. It's all in balance yet the voices of the outside world are at bay. They are not welcome here as much as I might need them they are banished, for they are unreliable historically and are not to be trusted. The "voices" of course are the people I might have let in but did not. Which four letter word do you with to pick? I can't deal with outside influences. People rattling on about what I should or should not do as if I do not know. Most people are so vain they do not even know I exist let alone have a life or make interesting moves. Most people that I know are so self involved that they can't see the subtleties of my life. And that is fine but their words bounce off my world like rubber balls, mostly because they really have nothing to say that adds value to my world. It's all about them, their struggle, their challenges and their pain. I have one or two friends that force themselves to listen occasionally, and that's cool. But for now I am happy with no voices. No criticism and no pedantic behaviors to annoy jostle and pollute my daily routine. It's lovely actually. I love being alone. Send in the clowns. Nah, why bother?

Organic Eating - The Fundamentals

Do you know what vegetables

to buy organic and what is not worth the trouble?

Organic vegetables are wonderful, and well worth their price, say some. Growing your own organic vegetables is best, of course. You feel safer knowing exactly what was used on your vegetables before they got to your table. But if you cannot grow your own organic vegetables, the argument goes, it is worth the trouble to find a store or farmers' market where you can buy them. So let's suppose you take that trouble. Let's suppose you find a source of organic vegetables.

Do you know what vegetables to buy organic? Are all organic vegetables worth the higher price?

Organic vegetables that are certified organic under U.S. Dept. of Agriculture regulations must be produced without most synthetic pesticides, synthetic fertilizers, antibiotics, growth hormones, and feed made from animal parts.

Organic certification sounds like something most of us would want, but is it always necessary? Is it worth the extra money?

What Vegetables to Buy Organic

These 5 organic vegetables are usually worth the higher prices, since conventionally grown versions contain high amounts of pesticide residues.

1. Green beans: Conventionally grown green Beans can contain three organophosphates that are toxic to the nervous system: acephate, dimethoate and methamidophos. They can also contain endosulfan, an insecticide that disrupts endocrine secretion.

2. Potatoes: Non-organic potatoes are increasingly being exposed to pesticides, according to the Consumers Union. These potatoes may contain dieldrin and methamidophos. While this is bad enough for adults, children who eat potatoes are at risk for a high dose of aldicarb, a pesticide that pervades the inside of the potato.

3. Spinach: Spinach is ahead of all foods when it comes to DDT. Other pesticide residues are claimed to be falling as U.S. farmers are learning to use less quantities of synthetic insecticides. Nevertheless, spinach still can contain permethrin and dimethoate. Permethrin is thought to be potentially cancer-causing.

4. Tomatoes: Tomatoes grown by conventional means have been found high in chlorpyrifos. Chlorpyrifos, also known as Lorsban for farm use and Dursban for home use, is the most heavily used insecticide in the United States.

5. Winter Squash: When tested, two-thirds of winter squash samples exceeded the safe daily limit for a young child of Dieldrin, a chlorinated, carcinogenic insecticide. Heptachlor, another powerful carcinogen was also found. Winter squash in baby food contained DDT.

What Fruits to Buy Organic

Organic vegetables are only part of the picture when it comes to produce. Organic vegetables are often peeled and cooked before eating. Organic fruits are often eaten unpeeled, especially by young children. Young children also consume much greater amounts of fresh fruit per pound of body weight than do adults. The pesticides are concentrated more highly in children.

So while you're thinking about what vegetables to buy organic, you should also consider these 7 fruits.

1. Apples: Apples can contain methyl parathion. Whether fresh apples, applesauce, or baby food, they can also contain chlorpyrifos.

2. Cantaloupe: Like tomatoes, cantaloupes grown by conventional means have been found high in chlorpyrifos.

3. Grapes: Imported grapes can contain dimethoate. Grapes grown in the U.S. contain methomyl and methyl parathion. Methomyl is a carbamate insecticide listed as an endocrine disruptor.

4. Peaches: Peaches are perhaps the worst of all fruits when grown conventionally. They contain high amounts of iprodione residue, classified by the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) as a probable human carcinogen. Peaches also contain methyl parathion, an organophosphate insecticide.

5. Pears: All conventionally grown pears, whether fresh or in baby food, can contain methyl parathion, as well as other insecticide residues.

6. Raspberries: Organic raspberries may be expensive, but you will be avoiding the fungicide captan, iprodione and carbaryl.

7. Strawberries: If you go for the beautiful red color of conventionally grown strawberries, you should know that it is caused by the fungicide captan, believed to be a possible human.

What Organic Vegetables Should You Buy?

Some organic vegetables are probably not worth the extra cost. When organic vegetables and fruits pose a health risk high enough to be listed by Consumers Union, however, you may want to take notice.

I wrote this post on www.forbetterlife.org. It is about my hero. Bobby Snow. "This is a story about my Aunt Bobby. She was the most loved person I ever knew. As a boy I remember visiting her and her husband Bob, son Randy and daughter Patty at their Gross Pointe home in Michigan. I arrived one summer after school had let out. I found a family filled with love and a home that ran smoothly but with the usual family drama. But there was a difference in this home. There was no sadness. Jokes and silly fun made a light- hearted home a dream from what I knew back east. I learned that Bobby had started the first Boy Scout troop in Michigan, and was involved with Girl Scouting and Brownies clubs. She and her husband Bob were chosen to be the God Parents by every family on their street. At the time I thought that was pretty cool. As the weeks went on I learned how to read and I learned how to love through her firm way of coaxing me to learn. I was a very sad child from a very sad home in a very sad city. Bobby is my hero because she knew how to live and she knew how to love and she knew how important it was to be fair even when it did not give her the advantage. She knew that winning was not always good and she knew that losing was not always bad. There was something about her and her husband Bob I have never seen before in any person then or even today. It was a kind of class, a kind of knowing that they had that made them glow with cheer and confidence. There was a kind of mystery about them like they knew something that they held dear that they knew was special. I think it was love. The kind of love that is refined and yet easy, natural and filled with life joy and humor. I tell my friends today that they do not make folks like that any more. Bobby S. was my aunt and my hero because she knew right from wrong and she practiced the Golden Rule to the letter. She always said you could not go too far wrong if you stuck with the Golden Rule. I have ever since. And though my life does not have the sparkle or the glee that their family did I got to see it and feel the love of people who I knew for certain loved me. That is why Bobby and her husband Bob are my hero's."

Beautiful American Elegance

Elegance in American culture is about balance. In a place where we have more than we need, where at every turn there is plenty, it is good to step back and take pause as to what things we want from this wonderful material world. What do we really need? Every person has a different set of requirements to perform their daily work tasks but living far beyond your physical needs can become a nightmare of material objects floating obstructing and distracting the inside of your world. Simplicity and wealth coexist among the rich more than we might think. And yet there are many beautiful homes in America all occupied by people, families who have obtained the right to such residences by what ever means. They are there and they occupy that space. Clear understanding of order and structure of your environment must find you in a place where it is always a pleasure to be... at home. Pleasing the physical senses, the need for privacy, continuity of personal experience and creative expression moment to moment uninterrupted are incredibly important to this new understanding of what is truly Elegant in life.

Attainable, elegance itself is not enjoyed by your average Joe. The feeling of a complete and ordered life is so rare yet it is within the grasp of most everyone. So why don't they have it? Elegance is an intellectual state of mind where one knows everything fits together in their world. Giving and receiving, playing and using the world for its riches is part of life here. Accepting our role in the planetary and cosmic or "universal" paradigm (set of assumptions) is as natural as the growing grass. Taking title to this privilege appears to be the problem when working a concept, job or goal. It is sad when people do not work towards unity but, indeed, it is their business and they must take responsibility for what exists in their world. Coarse disorganized and filthy living leads to meandering lives that are lived in continuous controlled colapse of imaginary structures (like the "American Dream") too large to manage. When these dreams/visions/imaginary goals falter order turns to chaos and we are removed from peace. Excessive ambition threatens peace, the precursor state of mind that brings forth the elegant human. The true American for whom opportunity is endless if he were only open to fields of different and diverse possibility and opportunity. If only he could focus on one thing at leave that focus upon a goal worthy of the individual then one stands a chance of achieving success. The trick is in the choice. Choosing a lifestyle is much trickier than one might think. By lifestyle I mean job, mate, and how you spend your time alone and when you are not at work. Elegance emerges when all things in your life are attended to in a life that is worth living. A life that positively effects others attracts the same encouraging enthusiasm "or vibe" from others. All other types of people tend to fall away into obscurity and are forgotten completely as we go about our tasks here in this place now.

Certainly the media taunts us and politics teases us into civic action and participation in the system as we know it but now life insists we do so to a greater degree than we are used to, effecting elegance a purely American Elegance also mis-coined "the American Dream" which to me just means buy more real estate and stuff to be happy. There is more to being an American than the American Dream. Our place in the universe is so special, it is a universal laboratory for human growth. However our planet has been recently rocked by war (again) and stupid decisions (again) based on greed and the inevitable suffering people experience when "the haves" strip the wealth deliberately and effectively from the hands of the "have not's." There is no guilt in the minds of the people who perpetrate these kinds of acts upon humanity. But who are the real terrorists? Who are the people are truly "out of line" in the world. What decisions are effecting the world negatively?

More on this topic later. Have a good night.

LESS ALONE An Exploration Into Internet Society

LESS ALONE:

AN EXPLORATION INTO INTERNET SOCIETY
or
A STUDY IN VOYEURISM INTERNET SOCIETY AND THE NEW SOCIETY
or
INSIGHT INTO PERSONAL SEPARATION UNITY AND THE STRANGE SPACE IN BETWEEN

Introduction:

“Internet society” is moving fast, very fast toward an unknown that is attracting legions of Americans, especially young people to a more intimate, pseudo reality than that “reality” that makes reality TV as archaic and structured as a soap opera. Welcome to the world of the video blog. A more voyeuristic view into the lives of celebrities and wanabe celebs who vie for your face time and your dollar as pre recorded Television goes the way of the Flintstones. Real-time internet reality video-blogs are going mainstream… with all their crude video foibles and boring circumstance they are becoming the new television especially for young viewers who want more of a connection with those around them.

Where did all this stuff come from? And all this before my spell checker has learned the word “blogging” this new generation of viewers is leaving the heavily formatted world of cable and network television for a more real time, interactive and less rehearsed form of entertainment.

Since real time internet video/television hooked up with interactive text blogging everything has changed. Instant blog-style feedback engages the mind of viewers-readers and the data could not be more welcomed or timely! Instantaneous feedback puts the fingers of the media monitors directly on the pulse of a rapidly changing society in real time. This provides valuable data that is worth big bucks while analysts bet on trends created or revealed directly from the commentary from viewers – the holy grail of market research.

Entertainment meets socializing?
So who are the girls of Nonsociety.com? They are three New York City friends, (can you say Sex and the City?) columnist Julia Alison designer Mary Ramen and hedge fund annalist Megan Asha. They can be viewed, blogged, and enjoyed much like the burgeoning stars of the fifties when television produced Lucy and Leave it to Beaver, these girls are walking a riding on the fast moving edge of media. They are perfecting a forward-thinking form of entertainment sure to capture the mind and dollars of a seriously bored television weary consumer market advertisers only once dreamed of. What do you have to do with this new wave of web-stars? Well nothing really. But they do everything in their power to make you think you are right there with them, enjoying that grilled Mahi Mahi or when you witness a real-time-blooper! The interactive qualities of these video blogs satisfy (and get valuable feed from) thousands of viewers on what they claim are “interesting daily activities” which might be an ice cream spill on a dress, their new shoes, what they are eating, what restaurants they are going to, what they are ordering, what tampon they buy ad nauseum! It makes a young girl in Hong Kong feel as though they are one of the girls in New York City. How cool is that? Has Sex and the City joined with Barbie’s dream house? Not quite. But the time has come for real girls of New York City to give this a shot and to make us feel less alone. If the entire public has not yet decided that television is too boring to hold their attention is it this kind of voyeuristic schlock that will hold their interest rather than wait for the weekly drama of Desperate Housewives? Is the DVR a vain attempt to hold market share from the dynamic and immediate gratification provided by new internet video? Tune out, tune in and don’t touch that dial / keyboard for we are only a market share away from television going the way of AM radio.

The interactive video blog-o-sphere is the new infant on the block. Interaction is key and the illusion of real participation and contact with internet stars is the hook. But is it contact? Is someone really there? Of course not! Is it a magazine, a TV show and a blog that you can talk to! It is an interactive mechanism that is interesting and fun and seductive in a creepy voyeuristic kind way, but unlike television, it draws you real-time into terribly a current “dialogue” that viewers find not only seductive but addictive. The higher reality being that it is global. New Yorkers have figured out that their grunge chic lives sell. And what the Girls of Nonsociety.com have figured out is that they while perhaps not the first in the blog-o-sphere to combine media in this manner may just be the best. They know how to give their public just enough gratification to engage them into their lives just enough to hook them while genuine interaction with The Girls of Non Society, if they are as smart as I suspect are collecting data that will eventually be processed into as many of your dollars as they can shove in their Coach handbags. While new interesting and fun it is my opinion that this playful mode of media will become another conduit to our bank accounts while creating a new kind of altar on which plain and simple dreamers can lay their dreams. Is this playful media or is it mechanical manipulation designed to pump fame, ego’s and bank accounts of celebrity wanabes while the viewer may “feel” less alone he or she is alone as ever… if not more so.

But is “less alone” good for you? While Madison Avenue is tickled pink with this new media grunge, dollars outweigh your psyche every time. Will a young girl blog endlessly with the girls of Nonsociety.com thinking she is really part of the lives of the girls while they are just sucking her soul and picking her pocket and mind for their piece of consumer market share? Of course! Once they figure out, if they have not already that feedback is date made “fun” will the girls on Nonsociety.com go down in history as the Lucille Ball of the internet? I can hear the orgasm from Madison Avenue now!